Growing by going deeper
Why deep questions matter
In a world where practical tips and tactical hacks are served up like fast food, I find myself more drawn to the bigger questions—the “why” behind it all. Maybe it’s my background as a physicist, where every answer only unlocked more profound questions. Or maybe it’s just the way I’m wired. Either way, I can’t help but feel that the real work in business doesn’t start with a checklist of to-dos or a polished pitch deck. It starts deeper, working from the inside-out.
The Midlife Perspective
This feels even more crucial in midlife, when the reality of our finite time on this planet sharpens our focus. We develop a visceral awareness that our time and energy are limited, that every choice is an opportunity to invest in something meaningful.
Today’s world—filled with complex challenges like climate change, inequality, and a loneliness epidemic—demands that we step back and ask:
“What kind of lives do we want to lead? What kind of impact do we want our work to make?”
This is why I believe so deeply in an “inside-out” approach to business. Tactics and tips are essential, but they’re only as effective as the underlying framework; the truer story we want to tell about our lives. Without clarity on what we believe, what we value, and what we want our work to mean, all the strategies in the world won’t feel meaningful.
Sources of Inner Clarity
For this kind of inner clarity, I find wisdom in sources like:
Buddhist practice: Teaching us the value of inner stillness, of seeing through the illusions that often drive our decisions.
Eckhart Tolle’s teachings: Emphasizing the importance of presence—observing our thoughts without being consumed by them, recognising that much of the “noise” we respond to is of our own creation.
Modern neuroscience: Confirming that our brains are wired to repeat habitual thoughts and responses, but also showing us the power of neuroplasticity—the ability to reshape our thinking toward curiosity, compassion, and resilience.
Psychological Tools for Self-Understanding
Psychology, particularly through frameworks like Internal Family Systems (IFS) and constellations work (a therapeutic approach that explores the dynamics within a family or group to reveal hidden patterns and connections), adds another layer. These approaches teach us to recognize that we aren’t just one fixed self; we’re a multitude of parts, each shaped by different experiences and sometimes conflicting needs.
We may have parts that carry old wounds, parts that seek achievement, or parts that long for freedom. By understanding and acknowledging these parts, we gain a compassionate perspective that helps us make decisions serving our whole being, not just the most anxious or reactive part of ourselves.
The Power of the Enneagram
The Enneagram, meanwhile, offers a powerful lens through which to view our habitual patterns and motivations. For example, understanding oneself as a Type 3 (the Achiever) might reveal a deep-seated drive for success and external validation, which can lead to overwork and burnout. By recognizing this pattern, a Type 3 can consciously shift towards more balanced and intrinsically motivated actions, leading to greater fulfillment. It identifies nine core personality types, each with its own way of perceiving and responding to the world. By exploring the Enneagram, we gain insight into the dominant patterns that shape our actions, whether it’s a drive for success, a desire for harmony, or a need to analyze.
Knowing our type helps us recognize not only our strengths but also our blind spots. This awareness doesn’t box us in; rather, it frees us to respond more intentionally, choosing actions that align with our highest values rather than reacting from ingrained habits.
Making Better Choices in Midlife
Midlife brings the urgency to focus on what matters most, and this inner work is foundational for making better choices. When we understand ourselves as a “self” made up of many parts and motivations, we can see which aspects of us might hold us back, and which are pushing us forward.
In a business context, this means moving beyond quick, surface-level decisions and instead acting from a place of alignment and clarity. It means bringing our entire history—and our entire potential—into our work.
The Gratifying Work of Deeper Questions
So yes, I love the practical side of business—sharing tips, mentoring others, creating strategies. At the same time, I find that practical work becomes far more impactful when it is rooted in deeper exploration. But the real work, the most gratifying work, is exploring these deeper questions. Because when we’re clear on what we believe, on the “why” behind our actions, the practical steps fall into place naturally.
They’re no longer about scrambling for success but about expressing who we are, contributing in a way that feels purposeful, sustainable and effortless.
True Success in Midlife
At midlife, cultivating this philosophical foundation isn’t just a luxury; it’s essential. By choosing to think deeply, to understand ourselves as a collection of parts, to see our motivations through tools like the Enneagram, and to align with our core values, we give ourselves both the strength to act and the permission to rest.
We find our place within the larger story, grounded in the knowledge that we’re making a difference—not because we’re doing everything, but because we’re doing what aligns most deeply with who we are. And perhaps, at this stage of life, that’s what true success really looks like.